Friday 14 October 2016

Runstreak Day 14 - rules for rubbish days

Today's run was all a bit octopus on a treadmill wearing rollerskates.  I just couldn't seem to get any flow to my running at all and I'm not even sure if my legs were receiving any of the signals my brain was trying to get through.  And then there was the breathing.  I was a sad gasping mess as I ran.  Huffing and puffing, the works.

I kept it short, chucked in a couple of hills and got myself round.  And now it's done I'm glad I did it.  Which is kinda handy really!  At least having done a fair old run streak before I know that days like this do just happen and you can't worry about them.  Not every run will feel easy.  Not every run comes over all Chariots of Fire in its epicness.  In fact, quite a lot of runs are just plain cack!  There are three rules for dealing with a crap run day:
1) Cut it short if you need to
2) Don't treat it as though that's how you normally run
3) Forget about it and move on.

I am now commencing rule number 3 while I drink a cuppa.  And... relax!

Tuesday 4 October 2016

Runstreak Day 4 - the one that nearly didn't count

Well, it did count... but some how I managed to muck up recording my run so a mile in, I went to check my pace, glanced down and saw the watch offering to save my run for me.  Rats!  I pressed resume and it resumed on 0.00 miles.  Grrrrr!!  I hate it when that happens.  It totally drives me crackers.  I know it's a bit pathetic but I do get a bit 'if it isn't recorded it didn't really happen' about my run streak runs.  And I'd only fancied doing a quick mile... so obviously I then had to run an extra mile to record the fact that I'd run a mile.

Okay... that doesn't make sense, but at the time my runner's logic said that it made sense.  Sorta.

How was the run?  Ermm... okayish.  I'm not going far at the moment, my main goal is just getting back into the simplicity of running.  Where I just get my trainers on, head out of the door and have time to just blank stuff out for a while.  I don't really want to run with anyone at the moment - which I'm not sure is understandable to anyone else - I need to be quiet.  So that's what I did.  Plugged in some music, headed out of the door and made up a route while I was at it.  I did run out of steam a bit after I realised my watch hadn't recorded my first mile... but that's because I was mentally throwing a hissy fit at my watch and having a 'couldn't be arsed' response to it all!

Tomorrow is a whole handful of days on this new run streak.  It's going to take me a while to find my rhythm with this, but I'm going to do it.  I have to reclaim my running - I've given too much of it to others over the past couple of years and I need to have it back.

Monday 3 October 2016

Runstreak Day 3 - just joggin'

Day 3 and I've managed to do another run first thing in the morning which got it out of the way nicely!  It felt a bit better than yesterday... it probably helps that I've started taking my iron tablets again.  At least I didn't feel faint and wheezy today which was a relief.

Oh yeah, and I ran on my own again today.  Could have run with others but I really do feel that I need time running by myself so that I can control all aspects of the run and not have to think about anyone else.  Selfish, huh?  It's just part of trying to rediscover that easy running which I used to love doing.  I can't hide my running demons when it's just me.  So instead, the idea is that I face them and find out what's up with me at the moment.

Anyway, it was a short run again.  Less than 2 miles and a seriously dull route!  I ran further up the hill before having a sneaky walk and could probably have carried on if I felt inclined to push it.  I can't believe that I managed 13 miles last weekend when a couple of miles is challenging enough!  I'm so glad I sold my place for the Tissington Trail HM next weekend.  I think doing that might have pushed me over the edge and turned me off running completely!

Sunday 2 October 2016

Runstreak Day 2 - yup, I started over...

So I gave up my last run streak.  I got to 795 days and decided that I just didn't want to run the next day.  And I didn't.  And with that little decision my run streak came to an end two and a bit years after I started it.

In the meantime, I've been running a half marathon each month to raise money for Great Ormond Street.  I've been running beginner groups.  And improver running groups.  I've run for patches of time every day, then stopped.  The thing that's really been happening though is that I've lost my pace and I haven't been feeling the love for running for quite a while.  That's not good.  Then, when I was running the Robin Hood Half Marathon last week... not enjoying it and not feeling good while I was running... I made a decision.  I decided not to do any more half marathons this year and to work on finding my love of running again.

For now, I'm going to attempt to run every day in October and see where it takes me.  I'd rather run a little each day and enjoy it, than slog out race after race and hate it.  This morning was my second day.  It wasn't easy - I ended up feeling faint and wheezy.  If I'm honest, I'm finding running a bit of a battle right now and I need to run on my own without any pressure at all.  I didn't even run very far - just a mile and a half - and I definitely didn't run very fast.  Still, I did it.  And tomorrow I'll do it again.  And again and again.  And maybe on one of those runs I'll rediscover the space, peace and strength that running gave me in the first place.