Running is amazing for letting you set goals. Right now, they're small.
I wanted to manage to get a run where I got 8 minute-something miles again. I want to be able to do a longer run with a 9 minute mile average - which, considering where I was at just a week ago, wouldn't seem a goal at all. But everything changed with the accident and now it feels like something that's just out of reach. I want to run with others. I want to feel confident enough to drive somewhere for a run. I want to be able to run the Robin Hood half. I really want that last one. All those months of running and working and trying... and not to be able to run that half marathon? I just want to get there. I want to complete it. I want to feel like me again.
That last one sounds like a small goal, but it's actually huge. And it feels really really far away.
My body feels less alien as the swelling goes down on my hips. New bruises seem to be appearing on my legs, feet and ankles, no doubt from when the car came to that awful sudden and complete stop. And my back and chest hurt constantly, reminding me of what happened.
But, if nothing else, I am a pretty determined person. And running gives me a freedom and a headspace that I am going to hold on to right now. Because more than ever, I need it.
That and my small goals.
Geeky stats stuff
| Distance: | 3.12 mi |
| Time: | 27:10 |
| Avg Pace: | 8:42 min/mi |
| Elevation Gain: | 110 ft |
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